Playing the Game...Right

My self-esteem has never been high due to last week event that gave me some level of confidence I thought I lost it (strange but true). The event somehow thought as another new beginning for more good things to follow after. I know of it… well, I hope it does. There’s a thing about confidence that makes you want to do so much at one go. You were like pumped up to be associated with lots of stuffs even with one that you thought impossible before. And when people actually take notice of you, it inspires you to ensure you will excel in everything that you do or at least give back some faith when it is nearly forgotten. But, it kinda depressing when at the end of the day, you found yourself made a few silly mistakes and wish you could do better, and worst when there’s those looks people make that made you feel guilty of the seven deadly sins, or at least one of them. Then again, that’s a circle of life kan?

Met a friend for coffee yesterday, initially to discuss about some work transaction that I am not exactly the expert although I am working there. Come to think about it, I do not know most of the important stuff about my organization. That’s not a good consciousness. Hmm… coming back to the meeting, the funny thing about is it I actually keep hoping since the first time we met, “…that he must be single…” although one can actually make a quick deduction that he is not when one take a good look at him. And when such thought kept playing in your mind, you have this undefined feeling every time he contacted you although all the signs was there that this is not what I am suppose to hope for anything at all. Thank God for the positiveness I am trying to work at, I am playing the game anybody would like to initiate, be it not at my territory at all and the result of that game as of now I’d say a win-win. We’ll see what happened in the next round or perhaps another match with another opponent another time. Who wants to play?

Read one article last time about things to do before you die, among them are “befriend with someone at least fifteen years older than you..”. How’s 48 with a lot I can learn from? well, if the lessons are worthy of learning ;-) I think I can strike that one in the ‘to-do list before you die’ eh?