The BIG finale closing in...

O yeah.. despite me being blue last month.. July is definitely fill with a lot to lookout for. And apart from what i have been babbled in previous entry, this one is another major feature not to be missed, Italy vs France match! Hope I can watch it in the hotel!

Definitely put my money on the Azurri team! Wish I can say something in their language while supporting them. Yeah, Like any one paying attention to that rather than watcing the big finale!!!

Go Italianos!!!!

Rock Star Mania strike again!

My obsession begins again. This time for a newly created band initiated by Tommy Lee of motley Crue, and together with James Newstead of Metallica and Gilbert Clark of Guns n Roses, they are looking for a frontman. Okay okay, I am not trying to make an extended promotion of that show in any way. That! Is to show my excitement again for the show despite I wasn’t really looking forward it prior its debut live!

The Rock Star:Supernova!

My choice for the preliminary round:
Mr J.Logan... he is so delicious for a rock star, and the soul within? o Brother! I like! a definite heartbreaker!

Too bad Matt has to be voted off first... but as what showed off to us audience, he didn’t bring the song Yellow justice anyway... it was just okay. Then again, who can sing like Chris Martin sings? Well, maybe one can... I just haven’t seen a duplicate just yet. Speaking of Coldplay... Guess what? I'll be seeing them LIVE in Singapore July 10th, Monday night, can't wait!!!

After that? I am soo looking forward to watch this season of Rock Star, I may not vote but, I definitely will enjoy the sight seeing and eventually day dreaming when one of those rock star can actually be mine...

Heheh... dream on, dream on... like A Rock Star will actually lay eyes on me?

A girl can definitely hope!

And then there's hope...

Knowing my sisters that well, I know one of them loves children so much and the other is on a neutral level :-) i.e. whenever she saw a very charming one, she'll adore one. Weirdly enough (when the latter one being neutral and such), for some mystifying reason, the children always drawn to her even though me and my younger sis crazy about those little kids. I guess kids do get attracted to what they thought a pure heart when us adult least likely to show our affection (not trying too hard I mean) and instead, we should just smile at them. So take not all of you who wanted to impress the kids (this advice is not applicable to you, pedophiles eh!)

One day, during our routine mobility from home to work and vice versa, the time when we managed to get our seat in the train, there’s a few incidents when you get a deep sleeper as you seating partner, and he or she will somehow cannot made their head to stay still and their neck and had to lean down.. (I hate those moments). And my sister, always made her point to not let any single adult strangers have their share in leaning their heads on the her shoulder when they fast asleep the minute they got to sit. She will do anything, be it giving a nudge or any sign that means “excuse me, I am not your shoulder to lean on” well, sort of speak.

Have that being said, and going back to my babbling about her being loved by children and all, one day, one kid actually had a sweet dream napping on her shoulder all the way from KL to Batang Benar (which is our stop). She just sits still and let that boy be until we have to get off the train. The father of the boy was so embarrassed that she just smiled and said she didn’t mind at all. And so I capture that precious moment and actually thought to myself, that “there is still hope”... And that; only we understood.

O father

I know Father’s day is belated, but June still is the month for the celebration, very much so… and contemplating on that, I do have something to say about it. The rest of this article might be unfair to a certain individual, but I rather like my voices heard therefore the rest of the individuals would do better for their children and ensuring a happy home on this earth. Let me tell you a story.

There was a kid; she grew admiring her father so much that she long for his approval in everything she did. She even wanted to follow his footsteps to become what her father was, in the navy (thank God she chose a different path!). Life gets tougher when the sisters were born; her dad’s attentions were all on them if not work or outside of home. Then she decided to struggle, got good grades, take care of the little sisters, basically being an obedient eldest daughter, and she even joined his Tabligh movement, learn all the Surah by heart when every other kids her age busy playing and not bother about the world around. Still, he is very hard to please. He saw everything she and her sisters did as another rebellious act to get what they want. Yet, all she wanted is “that’s very good, girl, keep up the good work”, not all the presents he promised if she ever got 1st place in academic achievement. (Still, she did not get everything despite winning first every year).

Then he started becoming mean… money was definitely the family constraints. Mom has to work; the girls were being independent beyond their years at that time. Unfortunately, dad did not value those sacrifices. Guess he just wanted more although he couldn’t give more. From an unfortunate event after another the following years, their father finally left them, for another woman. What worst is, he never put an effort to call her and her sisters regularly to at least showed he cares although he cannot gives any money (still?). All that admiration for him and backing him every time she did for nothing?

It is heartbreaking to see how she’s react in June every year. I wish she‘d stay strong for the rest of the family. Judging from the experience, I believed men frightens her. She always wonder if she ever married a man that could be the best father her kids will ever have. It is scary, comparing that to my life, knowing the men I met in my life that I almost suck him into my world… it is sad! So… am I wrong to be skeptical on this matter… it is all seems so similar… seems so much like me…. Can it be?

P/s: the card is till unsent, when will I have the courage to say… “I love you dad”

From one heart to another

What happened when you put two single ladies together in the room? Even for two completely different individuals who seldom talk, they actually have at least ONE thing in common, that is both shared some same unfortunate luck in love. A heart to heart talks/ a confession/a letting out things out of our chest and what else you call it session. After a very long conversation discussing that ONE matter, in the end, we decided to collaborate to have sweet revenge for self-redemption in future (with careful deliberation and planning that is). If only we were that cruel…

The findings from the swapping stories moments were shocking if not as predicted. How I was duped! The cliché of “romance in the office is a no-no” is a true fact not to be ignored in our course of life. Provided men are acting the same as what displayed in front of our eyes from 8 to 5.Well, at least to us… There’s…

1. …a sweet talking player.
2. …a hypocrite sweet talking player.
3. …a definite heart breaker
4. …a hot stuff who knew he is a hot stuff.

And others whom I may or may not discover yet…

Poor us for believing one could change for the better, and pity us for wanting to give others a chance and cause us to neglect those who care for us on daily basis. Then again, when one have someone faithfully standing by who cared for her since forever, the other one have a shoulder to cry on very far out of reach that breaks her every time when peace surrounds.

Bluish Sky

This whole week has been a battle of emotions for me, and despite I am feeling:

1. ...like a black sheep in the family,
2. ...like a lost puppy,
3. ...lonely like a freak high school kid,
4. ...unworthy of beling love,
5. ...intimidated,
6. ...tired,

I did lost another 0.5 kg. WooHoo!! And, that.. had just made my week.


p/s: I think I like these listing things out... will stick to it for more entries to come.

Wish List

I am publishing this wish list just in case someone noticed and will do something about it.

;-) hehehe

My Wish List by the end of the year of 2006:
1. SEIKO Watch
2. ZERO balance for all my credit cards
3. New pair of Jeans
4. New pair of suits
5. Get that chifon baju kurung I always wanted
6. Get a flower for my birthday
7. Achieve that goal weight
8. Enrol in Creative Writing Class by Sharon Bakar
9. Furnish all the rooms in the house.

nine wishes for now... save one more for the best one could ever wish for.

Points to ponder

"...A misyar marriage is contracted between a Muslim man and a Muslim woman of some means where the woman is aware of the man's impecunious circumstances and, in return for the marriage, foregoes her traditional right to expect the husband to provide for her upkeep...
The suggestion caused uproar among some Muslim men and women who considered such an arrangement to be demeaning because it made the man looks like an Islamic stud and the woman sex-hungry. But it was defended by the President of the Single Mothers' Association of Malaysia as a solution to the problem of women who only wanted the “protection” of a “mature and responsible” man. As the woman can provide for herself in every other respect, the husband's ability to feed and clothe her is unimportant. And such marriages have not been unknown – several women in her own family were married to men with lesser incomes.
I agree that Malays should utilize their time and energy on solving problems of academic, social and economic under-achievement. Leave misyar alone. It is not new, it has been practiced at least 1,400 years since the Prophet Mohammad, peace be upon him, married Khatijatul Kubra.
It is not necessarily about sex; that's why many Muslim women are still single. They want the right partner – mature and responsible who can be a good husband although not an ideal provider. Otherwise they would have married just about anyone. I know a number of Malay women who have had a number of suitors with anyone of whom they would have gladly set up house but their over-choosy parents had turned down these suitors and the daughters are too filial to disobey..."

I came across these comments made by Tun Hanif Omar in yesterday Star newspaper. He is totally right; Malaysians should be stopped in being brought to this kind of information to their mind. Do we need to worsen the statistics of divorces among Malays as it is now? Aren't there any more vital concerns that need our attention to be focused on for better future to young generations for future prosperity? Judging from this disappointment, it should be cleared hat this coming from a 'still single career woman" and I totally uncomfortable with the suggestions despite polygamy had been practiced since forever.

I hope men do not see this as another excuses to relieve those lusts that seems never enough, and women to not feel depreciated of being a woman… We deserve everything and anything better if not equal treatment. We do! God help us.

Hold up hold up...

Is it just me or is this blog has become a place to show off now? This is so not intended... Pardon me... I am just being so happy and determined to be different.. and some kinda loving feeling could be one of the factor... Could be... could be... or I might just be lost in my own territory... It's a good territory though... Some people may just won't allow to see me at ease.. darn those people...

Take a deep breath...

fuh...

Be at peace, be at peace...

I can sing!

you know what... I do believe I can sing... I just picked a wrong song to sing (as Simon would put it) I may not be Taylor Hicks who brilliantly made all song like his own... but I can definitely be Katherine McPhee... hehehe.. (masuk bakul angkat sendiri)

singing... o, o, o, o, o, o, o-o-o-o